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| Al Mirsa Collective |
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| Howard Brown |
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| Denim Days |
Bystander intervention is always on
our minds, and even more so after the horrific violence in Portland this past
weekend. While we don't know all the details
of this tragic incident, here's what we do know:
Violence is a tool of social
control. When people are made to fear
being their authentic selves or be out in public (as a woman, as an
"out" LGBTQ person, wearing a hijab), their lives become smaller.
The impact they make on the world around them is diminished for fear of too
much negative attention. The change that they can uniquely affect because of
who they are is shuttered. The constant threat of violence naturally has that
effect on those who are targeted for violence and hate crimes, which is the
intention - conscious or not.
When people act as bystanders, or
allies, they agree to share that risk. It
hardly ever means shouldering the burden in place of the person affected, but
hopefully means diminishing the impact for the target through an act of
solidarity. Young people know this when talking about helping someone who is
being bullied. Fear that the person will turn on them next is always in the
forefront of their minds. As it should be.
Most opportunities for bystander
intervention and acts of allyship expose us to less harm than what we
witnessed in Portland this past weekend - but all do involve taking on some
level of risk. And when we navigate our own levels of risk tolerance, what
we're really exploring is "How much am I willing to let this affect how
I navigate the world? How much am I willing to consider worrying about
speaking, worry about taking public transportation and having to choose
between guilt and danger? How much am I willing to let this affect my life in
order to help this person live more freely?"
If violence is a tool of social
control, we must acknowledge that it wants us to stay silent, even as
bystanders. It's designed to divide us,
to make us not ride public transportation, to avoid eye contact when someone
is being harassed, to change the topic when someone makes a hurtful comment
or "joke." Liberation demands that we resist - that we find ways to
persist and act in an unsafe world, to connect and speak up when someone is
being hurt - whether they are present or not.
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 What Can I Do?
Practice for action: When watching these viral videos or TV shows featuring
violence or hate crimes, imagine what you could do. If you practice creating
plans instead of practicing being stuck in overwhelm, it can help prepare you
for moments in your own life.
Confront denial: Acknowledge what is happening without minimizing the situation.
Create a risk assessment &
safety plan: Assess the level of threat.
Create a plan with contingencies to navigate an inherently volatile
situation.
Determine your approach:
· De-escalate the aggressor: What words could you say to create a
shift? What body language might be helpful?
· Support the person targeted: Check in, if possible, about what
they need; see that their safety and/or emotional needs are being met. Even
sitting beside the person target can help them feel supported.
· Mobilize others: Are there others that could act to help also?
Providing them with clear direction can help activate them.
· Create a distraction: This could release the pressure in an
intense situation, allowing some amount of de-escalation to happen naturally,
or for the person targeted to get away.
· Aftercare for the person targeted or others: Oftentimes forgotten
in these situations, caring for someone's emotional or physical needs after
an attack is just as important as intervention. Oftentimes in a situation
involving more than one bystander, people take on different roles. All of
these roles are necessary.
· Support accountability: People who act aggressively oftentimes
attempt to avoid responsibility for their actions. Supporting accountability
could be retelling what you witnessed to other community members, or helping
maintain their presence in the area while others arrive.
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