Monday, August 10, 2020

Adriana Li: Expanding Empowerment and Safety

Adriana Li, Coach Instructor, IMPACT Boston
Adriana Li, IMPACT Boston

Below Adriana Li, IMPACT Boston Coach, and an IMPACT Boston Suit demonstrate a scenario of two co-workers who get along as friends at work and who have lots of healthy dialogue about social-political issues. The coach character is non-binary. The suit character is cis-gendered. 

SUIT: Hey how’s it going? Hey did you see that article that went viral, about the new trans-rights law? What did you think about that? 

COACH: Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something on that note. I meant to bring it up earlier. 

SUIT: Oh yeah, what’s up? 

COACH: I’ve given it some thought lately, and I love talking to you about politics, but I’m realizing when it comes to these kinds of things, especially around trans rights, I would prefer not to talk about it anymore. 

SUIT: Oh no, wait why is there something wrong? I thought you loved talking about it? Plus, I figured I’d ask you, you just know so much about it. 

COACH: I did, I’m just realizing I don’t feel like answering questions anymore. It can be a lot. I’m noticing it’s starting to make me uncomfortable. I think you mean well, and it’s great you want to learn so much, but I’m sure there’s other ways you can find out about these things. I’d prefer not to talk about it anymore. 

SUIT: Oh I’m sorry, I see that, but how come you didn’t tell me before? 

COACH: You’re right, I didn’t tell you before; I own that. I think because of the work dynamic I just didn’t want to make it awkward. But in the future, can we just keep it to other topics? 

SUIT: OK I get it, yes definitely I can do that. 

COACH: Thank you, I appreciate that.

Adriana Coaching 
Adriana says:
I wrote the above scenario because it shows how important it is to set boundaries with people we know and that we can change boundaries as things come up for us. LGBTQ-advocacy and setting boundaries when having conversations, even with well-intentions, can be emotionally taxing and may mean creating new parameters, despite the healthy relationship. It’s about reinforcing limits when things come up for us, and clearly communicating that to others around us.  

 I also know how important it is to have physical tools. I got out of a situation once by using a version of an eye strike--I didn't know how to do it technically but it worked and gives me confidence in the techniques we teach.

Teaching courses for the LGBTQ community is important to me, especially for LGBTQ youth and women of color. Because of my own background as a survivor and with those I know who have experienced violence, I want to focus on marginalized kids and teens and provide support and alternatives for trauma survivors. I am committed to teaching critical thinking skills and providing a vision of alternatives. I want to help people expand their visions and choices. I love that the structure of IMPACT means eventually our students do not need us to fall back on, they only need to trust themselves. 

Adriana presenting
I am part of the LGBTQ community and have been since I can remember. My mother is from southern China and my father is Puerto Rican. I was bullied and alienated as a kid for being uncommonly biracial. I graduated from Pine Manor College in theater. Out of college I was the Science Programs Coordinator for the Children's Museum of Boston. In addition to my theater background, I had a natural knack for working with youth. I’ve been with IMPACT for three years now. I originally worked with Triangle, the disability agency that houses IMPACT Boston. I was working as a coordinator for young adults with disabilities who were developing job skills and I was attending a Kung Fu school in Chinatown when one of the instructors recommended the IMPACT Basics Course to me. He happened to have been a suited instructor with IMPACT Boston several years before and he knew I was a survivor.

When I took the Women's Basics Class, I noticed I was the only student of color in the class. I was hyperaware that I was in a mostly-white space, something I was not used to in my college and childhood experiences. I've also noticed that hyperawareness by other people of color in programs that are predominately white. I am committed to creating safe spaces and providing space for conversations that are relevant to the experiences of people of color and all gender identities; for example, directly addressing systemic inequality and authority violence. One of my approaches for creating safer space in on-line programs is asking people to personally email me and share with me why they want to take the program. Online, the unfortunate reality is anyone could pretend to be in a specific community. By asking people to email me, I'm not only screening, but I'm making a personal connection.

I've had so much support from the IMPACT Boston staff and connecting with other IMPACT chapters and ESD organizations. I consulted with Linda Leu from IMPACT Bay Area about the Women of Color course. I helped train IMPACT Safety in Ohio in IMPACT: Ability and also helped in suit training for Turtle Mountain staff. My dream, in doing this work, is to see more people of color given platforms to be represented,and empowered, in spaces everywhere.

Based on an interview of Adriana Li July 2020 by Martha Thompson, IMPACT Chicago Lead Instructor and Admin Co-Team Leader.




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